Oh Hanukkah!

How sweet and demure you are! Like a lovely debutante in her blue glimmering dress chatting decorously with the women in their silver frocks and the men in their waistcoats (Just go with me here)... The beauty whom the men quietly admire and solemnly ask to dance at every ball for 8 nights in a row. A truly graceful creature of a holiday.

AND THEN THERE'S CHRISTMAS-- Who let that sassy, overbearing, indecent hussy into our fine soiree?! She's off in the corner with her rouged cleavage and hooker lipstick and her high-cut red and green mini skirt trimmed with curly ribbon, singing along with the 4-piece chamber ensemble that was hired for the dancing. She's cutting in on the other women; she's talking too much about inappropriate things at the top of her lungs, when everyone else would just love to be pretty and quiet and grown-up...

Yes, I celebrate Christmas. It's not that I hate Christmas; I do believe that I could really truly love Christmas, but I just heard "Santa Baby" twice in one hour, and I will never forgive the person who did that to my once lovely and decent Christmas.